So I went to this party last night with the whole family.
The party was fun. Miss M had a great time running around and playing near other kids. Most of the kids were older. D-man and my hub stayed upstairs and watched the game.
There was a young boy there who I would say was about 8ish. I have a hard time with that age range but that will be my guess.
He arrived late and brought with him a mom, dad and sister. All very nice.
About 15 minutes after he got there I was walking down the hall and happened to watch as he snatched a Lightning McQueen doll from my daughter. She started to cry.
Now when kids are evenly matched I try not to step in but he clearly out weighed, aged, everythinged her. So I said "now she was playing with that and you can't just snatch things away from other people, we are all sharing here."
His response was that they needed that.
I chuckled and told him that I couldn't think of anything that they would need the car for.
Maya turned away, toy in hand and declared she needed to go potty. I handed the toy to the boy as we headed for the bathroom and he tossed it on the floor, his need gone.
Later on that night I was looking for Miss M as we were getting ready to go. Again I happened to witness this same boy slam the door in my daughter's face and tell her that she couldn't play with them. He actually shooed all the other kids into the room and then told them all "everyone except her". Now I can't tell you what he might have against my daughter, but I was almost as hurt as she was.
I knocked on the door and told him he could not talk like that to her and that if didn't want her playing with him he would have to ask her nicely.
"Please don't play with us"
I turn to M. "It's okay honey we have to go home now anyway."
I hustled my screaming three year old toward the stairs and tried to gather all of our stuff as quickly as I could. As we strapped her in the car she told her father how the boy told her " no not you, you can't play." As we snuggled on the couch watching TV she told me about the boy and how he had very bad manners. As we settled her down for the night she once again told me about the boy.
I have to tell you honestly, I don't like that boy.
I told Maya that mommy had stepped in and told him that he can't talk to people like that, next time she told the story, she added in my part.
I then told her that if someone is mean to her again like that she should say "you can't talk to me like that, that's bad manners."
Next time she told the story, she herself told the boy about his bad manners.
I know that she and I will face many more moments of hurt feelings and I am glad that she is the one getting her feelings hurt than the one hurting (at least for now). It's a tough one, I want her to be strong enough to defend herself but I don't want to see her hurt. Ah the delicate balance that is a part of everything.
May it be yours in the New Year.
Don't forget your please and thank yous.