I developed our environmental policy while playing with my daughter the night before last.
I think that if all the nation's in the world adopted this policy we could put an end to greenhouse gases and clean up pollution worldwide.
It's a tough job but I think this will get it done:
clean up
clean up
everybody everywhere
clean up
clean up
everybody do their share
Afterall, everything I need to know I learned in kindegarten.
So simple even Bush should understand it.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Friday, January 05, 2007
In God we Trust
So I have a new year's resolution.
It is that I will not trust a word either of my parents tell me without proof or corroburation from the source.
My brother has not chosen his friend to watch over my niece should something happen to him. He trusts that family will make the decision that will be best for Raya at whatever stage her life is in should anything happen to them.
He assumes that means that between his MIL, my parents and me and Tim we will decide what will happen to Raya together. There was never a question of anything other than family. Never.
I am so relieved that I can't even be pissed at my folks.
It is that I will not trust a word either of my parents tell me without proof or corroburation from the source.
My brother has not chosen his friend to watch over my niece should something happen to him. He trusts that family will make the decision that will be best for Raya at whatever stage her life is in should anything happen to them.
He assumes that means that between his MIL, my parents and me and Tim we will decide what will happen to Raya together. There was never a question of anything other than family. Never.
I am so relieved that I can't even be pissed at my folks.
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
ungodly terror
My daughter is going through a phase. Today.
I am confident that tomorrow she will be through the phase and this will be behind us.
She is pushing pushing pushing.
Today she screamed NO at me for something so small that I told her if she said no to me again she was in time out. Then she kept asking for chocolate or pudding or something like that and she asked and I told her that she might get it if she finished her lunch three times before I told her that if she asked again she was in time out. I made it to 2 with 3 on my lips at least 15 times today.
I threatened time out over and over and every time she changed her behavior just in time to avoid "the chair".
She said no to my face and smiled. She pitched ugly fits and laughed. She took 2 hours to finally fall asleep at nap time.
She also danced the hokey pokey with me. She hugged me and climbed all over me.
She smiled at me and thanked me for playing with her. And while all of that is terribly cute and terribly sweet it doesn't change the fact that she was acting terribly today.
I am hopeful that my sweet tender little girl will return soon.
And I know that when she does she will just be visiting until the teen years.
Heaven help us both.
I am confident that tomorrow she will be through the phase and this will be behind us.
She is pushing pushing pushing.
Today she screamed NO at me for something so small that I told her if she said no to me again she was in time out. Then she kept asking for chocolate or pudding or something like that and she asked and I told her that she might get it if she finished her lunch three times before I told her that if she asked again she was in time out. I made it to 2 with 3 on my lips at least 15 times today.
I threatened time out over and over and every time she changed her behavior just in time to avoid "the chair".
She said no to my face and smiled. She pitched ugly fits and laughed. She took 2 hours to finally fall asleep at nap time.
She also danced the hokey pokey with me. She hugged me and climbed all over me.
She smiled at me and thanked me for playing with her. And while all of that is terribly cute and terribly sweet it doesn't change the fact that she was acting terribly today.
I am hopeful that my sweet tender little girl will return soon.
And I know that when she does she will just be visiting until the teen years.
Heaven help us both.
Friday, December 29, 2006
God made lightning
So I went to this party last night with the whole family.
The party was fun. Miss M had a great time running around and playing near other kids. Most of the kids were older. D-man and my hub stayed upstairs and watched the game.
There was a young boy there who I would say was about 8ish. I have a hard time with that age range but that will be my guess.
He arrived late and brought with him a mom, dad and sister. All very nice.
About 15 minutes after he got there I was walking down the hall and happened to watch as he snatched a Lightning McQueen doll from my daughter. She started to cry.
Now when kids are evenly matched I try not to step in but he clearly out weighed, aged, everythinged her. So I said "now she was playing with that and you can't just snatch things away from other people, we are all sharing here."
His response was that they needed that.
I chuckled and told him that I couldn't think of anything that they would need the car for.
Maya turned away, toy in hand and declared she needed to go potty. I handed the toy to the boy as we headed for the bathroom and he tossed it on the floor, his need gone.
Later on that night I was looking for Miss M as we were getting ready to go. Again I happened to witness this same boy slam the door in my daughter's face and tell her that she couldn't play with them. He actually shooed all the other kids into the room and then told them all "everyone except her". Now I can't tell you what he might have against my daughter, but I was almost as hurt as she was.
I knocked on the door and told him he could not talk like that to her and that if didn't want her playing with him he would have to ask her nicely.
"Please don't play with us"
I turn to M. "It's okay honey we have to go home now anyway."
BAHWAHBAHWAH!
I hustled my screaming three year old toward the stairs and tried to gather all of our stuff as quickly as I could. As we strapped her in the car she told her father how the boy told her " no not you, you can't play." As we snuggled on the couch watching TV she told me about the boy and how he had very bad manners. As we settled her down for the night she once again told me about the boy.
I have to tell you honestly, I don't like that boy.
I told Maya that mommy had stepped in and told him that he can't talk to people like that, next time she told the story, she added in my part.
I then told her that if someone is mean to her again like that she should say "you can't talk to me like that, that's bad manners."
Next time she told the story, she herself told the boy about his bad manners.
I know that she and I will face many more moments of hurt feelings and I am glad that she is the one getting her feelings hurt than the one hurting (at least for now). It's a tough one, I want her to be strong enough to defend herself but I don't want to see her hurt. Ah the delicate balance that is a part of everything.
May it be yours in the New Year.
Don't forget your please and thank yous.
The party was fun. Miss M had a great time running around and playing near other kids. Most of the kids were older. D-man and my hub stayed upstairs and watched the game.
There was a young boy there who I would say was about 8ish. I have a hard time with that age range but that will be my guess.
He arrived late and brought with him a mom, dad and sister. All very nice.
About 15 minutes after he got there I was walking down the hall and happened to watch as he snatched a Lightning McQueen doll from my daughter. She started to cry.
Now when kids are evenly matched I try not to step in but he clearly out weighed, aged, everythinged her. So I said "now she was playing with that and you can't just snatch things away from other people, we are all sharing here."
His response was that they needed that.
I chuckled and told him that I couldn't think of anything that they would need the car for.
Maya turned away, toy in hand and declared she needed to go potty. I handed the toy to the boy as we headed for the bathroom and he tossed it on the floor, his need gone.
Later on that night I was looking for Miss M as we were getting ready to go. Again I happened to witness this same boy slam the door in my daughter's face and tell her that she couldn't play with them. He actually shooed all the other kids into the room and then told them all "everyone except her". Now I can't tell you what he might have against my daughter, but I was almost as hurt as she was.
I knocked on the door and told him he could not talk like that to her and that if didn't want her playing with him he would have to ask her nicely.
"Please don't play with us"
I turn to M. "It's okay honey we have to go home now anyway."
BAHWAHBAHWAH!
I hustled my screaming three year old toward the stairs and tried to gather all of our stuff as quickly as I could. As we strapped her in the car she told her father how the boy told her " no not you, you can't play." As we snuggled on the couch watching TV she told me about the boy and how he had very bad manners. As we settled her down for the night she once again told me about the boy.
I have to tell you honestly, I don't like that boy.
I told Maya that mommy had stepped in and told him that he can't talk to people like that, next time she told the story, she added in my part.
I then told her that if someone is mean to her again like that she should say "you can't talk to me like that, that's bad manners."
Next time she told the story, she herself told the boy about his bad manners.
I know that she and I will face many more moments of hurt feelings and I am glad that she is the one getting her feelings hurt than the one hurting (at least for now). It's a tough one, I want her to be strong enough to defend herself but I don't want to see her hurt. Ah the delicate balance that is a part of everything.
May it be yours in the New Year.
Don't forget your please and thank yous.
Thursday, December 28, 2006
The holy trinity
I find it amusing and oddly reassuring that one who is so very ungodly would be so tied to what seems to be a very religious post. Today I am going to talk about those things that I hold dear.My loves, my life, etc.
On the note of my life, I have only one word - hectic.
I am not sure why but 2006 seems determined to end on a bad note. A very loud painful to the ears bad note. Here is what's happening in my holy trinity.
1. Family (pictured here). On Christmas Day my father decided to drop the bomb that my brother and his wife have chosen some very good friends to be the guardian's of my niece should anything ever happen to them. Not me and my husband. I am still reeling from that and won't even go into the depth of the issue.
2. Work. At work we had critical equipment fail, critical vendors fail and an employee or two that are failing as we speak. (even though I am blogging from work I do not count myself among their numbers... odd)
3. Health. My dear boy is having a hard time of it as he still battles a raging ear infection he has had since late October. I have an appointment to meet with a doctor about his tubes next week. On a personal note, my tonsils are so swollen that they are now pressing on my inner ear drum and causing ear infection like pain. My doctor says I should plan on having them removed this year.
And there you have it - my holy trinity. I am just trying to keep it together and hoping that the one in Time's Square is the only ball to drop in my life any time soon.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
One Nation Under God
Yipee!
Okay let me repeat that! YIPEE!
I am so hopeful today. I kissed my daughter yesterday as I left to cast my vote and when she asked me where I was going I told her the truth.
"mommy is going to change the world so that you and your brother have a better future."
I am in Pennsylvania. I am in the land of Santorum. I cannot express my relief that he is no longer representing my vote in Washington. If nothing else had changed with the dawn of this new day, I would have been happy with just that.
But there is more change. And there is hope again for the american people, in the american people.
We have voiced an opinion of dissent. Perhaps we will now be heard.
Maybe not.
But I am hopeful we will keep talking.
Okay let me repeat that! YIPEE!
I am so hopeful today. I kissed my daughter yesterday as I left to cast my vote and when she asked me where I was going I told her the truth.
"mommy is going to change the world so that you and your brother have a better future."
I am in Pennsylvania. I am in the land of Santorum. I cannot express my relief that he is no longer representing my vote in Washington. If nothing else had changed with the dawn of this new day, I would have been happy with just that.
But there is more change. And there is hope again for the american people, in the american people.
We have voiced an opinion of dissent. Perhaps we will now be heard.
Maybe not.
But I am hopeful we will keep talking.
our father
I have made some life decisions recently that I hope will make a great difference in the way I traverse and view the world. I am trying to release spite. I am trying to embrace my faults and celebrate the fact that they are a large part of who I am and who I am is worth embracing.
I am trying to stop painful cycles that hurt only me. I am trying to see and accept that people can only love me as much as they are capable of and if I want more than they can give then I will be hurt but they will still love me, just as they always did. I am accepting the limitations of others and realizing that all the love I get is good love.
So what does this have to do with my father? Nothing really.
I could expand on the fact that he made me who I am in no small part. And this is a good thing and a bad thing. But mostly I will just say that I love him for who he is and how he treats the people in his life. He is a good man. A man who will always want to be in the center of the spotlight and has a tendency to pout. He is a man, flawed like all men.
My brother is the second father in my life. He too demands the spotlight, he is just not quite as aware of this as a personality trait and so he can actually be a little more of a challenge. He is not as old as my father and so his self awareness may come. He may also have a shift in his personality as time goes by. He has limits and he is the reason that I turn my gaze inward. I love him as I love and he loves me as he loves and that is enough. It has to be. Because that is all there is and I have to stop being hurt by his best efforts.
My husband is my main man. The keeper of my key and the father of my children. He is rash and moody and sweet and loving. He is a good man. He is involved and engaging and he can be selfish and selfless and annoying and endearing all at the same time. He is flawed. Our children do not yet understand their luck.
So as I look around at the fathers in my life I realize that the only thing that I can change in our relationships for the most part is me. I cannot continue to feel unloved by these men that love me with all that they have to give. I need to be satisfied with the love I get.
Don't get me wrong. I am not talking about spousal abuse or giving up an expectation of respect and understanding. And my relationship with my husband is stellar. He understands what I need because he needs the same things. We are well matched and complement each other in almost all things.
This is a declaration of independence for myself. These fathers are now free to love me as they will and I am free to enjoy that love without expectation and disapointment. Nothing will change for them, and I will be happier.
win win.
I am trying to stop painful cycles that hurt only me. I am trying to see and accept that people can only love me as much as they are capable of and if I want more than they can give then I will be hurt but they will still love me, just as they always did. I am accepting the limitations of others and realizing that all the love I get is good love.
So what does this have to do with my father? Nothing really.
I could expand on the fact that he made me who I am in no small part. And this is a good thing and a bad thing. But mostly I will just say that I love him for who he is and how he treats the people in his life. He is a good man. A man who will always want to be in the center of the spotlight and has a tendency to pout. He is a man, flawed like all men.
My brother is the second father in my life. He too demands the spotlight, he is just not quite as aware of this as a personality trait and so he can actually be a little more of a challenge. He is not as old as my father and so his self awareness may come. He may also have a shift in his personality as time goes by. He has limits and he is the reason that I turn my gaze inward. I love him as I love and he loves me as he loves and that is enough. It has to be. Because that is all there is and I have to stop being hurt by his best efforts.
My husband is my main man. The keeper of my key and the father of my children. He is rash and moody and sweet and loving. He is a good man. He is involved and engaging and he can be selfish and selfless and annoying and endearing all at the same time. He is flawed. Our children do not yet understand their luck.
So as I look around at the fathers in my life I realize that the only thing that I can change in our relationships for the most part is me. I cannot continue to feel unloved by these men that love me with all that they have to give. I need to be satisfied with the love I get.
Don't get me wrong. I am not talking about spousal abuse or giving up an expectation of respect and understanding. And my relationship with my husband is stellar. He understands what I need because he needs the same things. We are well matched and complement each other in almost all things.
This is a declaration of independence for myself. These fathers are now free to love me as they will and I am free to enjoy that love without expectation and disapointment. Nothing will change for them, and I will be happier.
win win.
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